I am finally back in the warm Caribbean sun for round two of my premed studies. I must say that I am actually beginning to like it here. The people seem more friendly, the scenery breath-taking, the breeze soothing, and the ocean vivid with intense shades of glittering blue. I never noticed how beautiful the college campus was until this time around. This realization did not happen automatically, because I have been preparing myself mentally for over a month. I was set on liking it this semester and wahla, I do!

         I came with an open mind with all preset conditions and experiences consciously laid aside. I was going to appreciate Grenada, and I was intent on that. When I arrived I did not refer to it as a place of sacrifice this time, but instead an oasis of refuge and beauty. My very own paradise to study medicine by the majestic sea. This was a dream I had previously denied, but now I have come to realize.

        The memories I make and the moments I share with those around me will become my lasting pillars unto which I will create myself. I still have much to discover about myself and the art of dealing with others. I still have to break many habits that threaten a character with genuine attributes. I still long for many dreams to become a reality. However, with all of these inner and outer desires comes a peaceful serenity of accepting what is. The turbulence is less frequent as I begin to accept and surrender to the moment and possess myself within its will with a smile. Views and opinions of mine are becoming more malleable as I witness the vicious entitlement of others ideals. Some stand so strongly by their opinions and views on issues that it frightens one to listen with rationale at the ignorance. I do not hesitate for even a moment to see my own ignorance for harboring such baseless views and labeling them my own due to years of unconscious priming. I am without a label, view, opinion, or ideal still me. This does not exclude my principles that I stand firmly with. Such universal principles as integrity, self respect, honesty, and sincerity. I have not perfected my principles in practice but each day is a struggle and not worth living unless one is continuously striving to live a righteous life.  

          When judgement does not inhibit the vast scope of life, it opens possibilities that are infinite. I have learned to stop being a victim, the devil’s advocate, or a moral judge. I am merely me trying to live a life with purpose while grappling with the reality of the human condition. 

           It has been a long time since I sat down to write since I left home about a week ago. It feels great to sit back and just reflect every once in a while amidst a hectic college schedule. Connecting with one’s thoughts is like seeing a stranger in the mirror or digging a huge hole not knowing what treasure or bone will come out. Self exploration is one of the hardest journeys but at least one of the most rewarding. 

– God bless

Advertisements